Hello everyone, I created this account just to ask for advice on this issue, as it’s really important to me. My girlfriend—well, now my ex—and I are going through a breakup, and we have two cats that we’ve raised together. They got along well at first, but now they mostly avoid each other and often fight. I’m wondering if it would be better for the cats if we each take one, or if that would just stress them out more. What do you think?
Based on what you said, it seems like they were bonded and then weren’t. If you separated them, they probably wouldn’t care. You could keep them apart for a bit and see what happens. Revisit ‘shared custody’ if they don’t do well on their own.
That might be a good way to see how things develop. How can you tell if being separated is harmful for them?
Cats often vocalize their distress, but if they’re more quiet, look for signs like lethargy, hiding, or not eating. If you move, they might act stressed at first, so give it a few weeks.
I know cats separated from their bonded mates will search for them, yowling and trying to find the other cat. If fur starts to grow back and the smaller kitty does better, I’d keep them separated.
I broke up with my ex, and the cat I took is thriving as an only cat. Sounds like your cats would benefit from separation.
I definitely think they would both fare better as only cats. You and your ex should each take one.
Please separate them; they don’t seem that into each other. If one or both are female, they typically don’t like sharing space.
I’ve seen cases where cats see the weaker one as a target. If the sick cat suddenly seemed like a stranger, that might explain the fighting. Separation could help everyone’s peace of mind.
Separate them. You take one and she takes one.
Separation sounds like it wouldn’t hurt. When introducing cats to new environments, consider using a cat pheromone diffuser to ease anxiety.